Archive for March, 2007
I received a notice in the mail this weekend from Universal Studios in Orlando that the Back To The Future ride is closing FOREVER on March 30. This was pretty shocking to me… I’ve always considered the Back To The Future ride at Universal to be the greatest thrill ride simulator ever made (until Universal created the Spiderman ride at Islands of Adventure).
My wife and I have season passes to Universal because our almost 3 year old son loves both Universal parks in Orlando. (He could watch the Barney show 15 times a day without ever getting bored.) So, as season pass holders, we received this postcard saying that the Back To The Future ride is closing forever. That’s kind of sad… I had looked forward to riding that ride with my son when he got old enough, but I’m sure if they’re closing one of the greatest rides ever made, that can only mean something even better is going up in its place.
I love roller coasters and thrill rides. My wife doesn’t. When I first started dating her, we went to Orlando for a weekend and I played one of the all time great practical jokes on her. She’s terrified of roller coasters- specifically the big drops. My favorite ride at Disney at the time was the Tower of Terror, which is like a 10 story free fall drop. It’s a cool ride because the anticipation builds as you make your way up the tower in darkness… getting higher and higher, until the doors open and you realize you’re 10 stories high and then the coaster just plunges in a free fall to the bottom. There was no way my (future) wife was going on that ride. So I concocted a plan.
I explained to her that like Back To The Future, the Tower of Terror was a simulator. That you don’t actually drop and you never really move from your original location. Apparently she trusted me enough not to be alarmed that you could actually see screaming people at the top of the Tower of Terror when the doors would open 10 stories high. And yes… I got her on the ride. I can still (12 years laters) picture her face when she realized (too late) that the ride wasn’t a simulator and we were actually moving higher and higher.
When those gates opened and she realized we were so high up, she let out a blood curdling scream that was probably heard throughout Orlando. THAT was a fun ride. And she still married me.
So, Back To The Future is closing forever. If you never rode that ride, you missed out. It was a great one. I figured it would be cool to post responses to this blog about favorite rides and theme park experiences… I grew up in Chicago, so I have a ton of Great America memories. (They had a great wooden roller coaster called The American Eagle. And they had an awesome coaster called The Demon.) I haven’t been back to Great America in probably 20 years. How about you? Favorite rides? Least favorite rides? Let’s hear it.
March 26th, 2007
I was having a conversation with someone this past weekend about video games. We were talking about which video games we remember from growing up and why. And as any red-blooded 37 year old will tell you (that’s my age), there was no greater video game system EVER than Intellivision. Intellivision will go down as the greatest video game system in history. Better than Nintendo… better than Playstation… better than Sega… Intellivision will always be champ.
The first video game system I ever had was called “Fairchild.” (Anyone remember that one?) Then I upgraded to the Atari 2600. For you kids out there, Atari 2600 was the MUST HAVE video game system when I was growing up. The graphics were terrible. The sound was terrible. The colors were terrible. And we played it for hours at a time.
You’ve never experienced true video game basketball until you’ve played Atari 2600 basketball. One player on each side- a stick figure. (One was red- the other blue.) The ball was square. You had no control over where you shot the ball. You had as much chance of making a half court shot as you did a layup. Atari 2600 basketball was terrible… but we didn’t know any better, so we loved it. The same was true for Atari baseball. In Atari baseball you moved all 3 outfielders at once. Move them all right… move them all left… but dammit, you’re moving them all together. This is how we Atari kids grew up… And then came Intellivison.
Intellivision changed everything. The graphics were better. The sounds were better. The games were more realistic. No more did we have to injure our hands on the Atari joystick… Now we were able to control everything better with the Intellivision disc. The controller was a keypad with a disc on the bottom. So advanced! You could actually control a particular fielder in Intellivision baseball with the click of a button on the keypad.
I have great memories of Intellivision baseball, basketball, football, and even soccer. There were other cool games too… like skiing, blackjack, and a game that no one remembers but me… Snafu. Anyone remember Snafu? That game was addictive and had really cool video game music. (I don’t think I’ve ever met someone that remembers Snafu.) (Speaking of things no one remembers- Anyone remember the video game system 3DO?)
Oh, Intellivision. I remember you so fondly. I wasn’t loyal to you though… The moment Colecovision came out, I threw the Intellivision away and upgraded to Colecovision. (Coleco was pretty damn cool too… It was like having Donkey Kong and Donkey Kong Jr. right in your house!) I owned other video game systems through the years too… Bally… Atari 7800… Nintendo. But none bring back memories quite like the Intellivision. Those times are gone. A relic in today’s realistic video game world. But I know I’m not alone when I yearn for the happy days of Intellivision. You can keep your “Doom” and “Madden 2007.” I’ll take Intellvision Space Armada every time.
March 19th, 2007
Most sports talk shows eagerly await March because it gives them days and days of talk breaking down the NCAA tournament brackets. We here on the Dan LeBatard Show get excited about March, but not because of the NCAA tournament. We get excited because it’s our chance to hold our own tournament- our March Sadness tournament.
It started three years ago when Dan called me the night before the tournament started. He was saying that we should do something a little fun for the tournament… a little something different. And that’s when it hit me: Instead of a basketball tournament of 64 teams, we would hold a tournament of 64 “80’s songs.” I imagined it in my head… “Tainted Love” going up against “99 Red Balloons.” It was pure genius. I was tremendously excited about it… And it sucked. It might have been the worst show we ever did.
We knew it sucked within the first hour of the show. It wasn’t funny. It wasn’t entertaining. In fact, it was boring. But we didn’t stop. We steamrolled ahead for 3 HOURS. That’s right. We did 80’s songs for 3 HOURS. We even had Pat Riley booked as a guest that day, and we didn’t even stop for him. We forced him to listen to 80’s songs and pick which one was better. It was painful. Probably the most painful show we’ve ever done. What a disaster. And now… it’s a tradition.
Now we create our own tournament for March Madness every year. Last year we did 64 “sounds” from the show. The top four seeds were: Suey, the big voice saying Dick Pole, Chuck Norris’ laugh, and Evander Holyfield mumbling. None of those sounds made it to the final four. The final four last year consisted of: Stugots saying “whaaaaat,” Kevin Rogers saying “it’s so macaroni,” George the Animal Steele saying “huh?”, and Florida was represented by Jennifer Tilly saying, “Noooooooo!” You all remember how the tournament played out. Florida and Jennifer Tilly were the winners.
This year it’s FAKES. Our show is known for fakes. Fake Howard, Fake Cote, Fake Ali G, Fake Hubie Brown, Fake Al Pacino. and the list goes on. We had no problem finding 64 fakes. Some you’ll remember… some you may never have heard. But this year you will listen (or you might switch to Hank) to a field of 64 Fakes whittled down to one. One single fake will be standing when the tournament is over. Who will it be? We will all find out together. The anticipation builds.
March 12th, 2007
I have written several blogs about which guests I think are the best guests on our radio show. After this past week of shows, I’m more certain than ever that Michael Irvin is the single greatest guest we have. He’s got star power… he’s got a colorful history… and he is one of the most captivating speakers I’ve ever heard. He joined us for 2 hours on Friday’s show, and if you missed it, you missed some truly great radio.
Everything he says is interesting. I maintain that if you asked him what he had for lunch, and he said, “I ate a sandwich and chips…” It would be the most exciting thing you heard from anyone that day. I could listen to Michael Irvin talk all day long and never get tired of him… that’s why he maintains my number one ranking as “top guest.” And I understand that we have guests on that have “more” celebrity than him, but no one is as honest and entertaining at the same time.
Here’s where things start to get a little interesting… I think I might be moving Bob Ryan from the Boston Globe to the number two spot! You read me right. Bob Ryan might be my second favorite “regular” guest on the show. (I’m not including Chris Rock, Andre Agassi, and other gigantic stars that come on the show just one time.) My guest rankings are based on people that appear on the show on a fairly regular basis.
If you didn’t hear the exchange Dan had with Bob Ryan over whether or not Dennis Johnson should be in the Hall of Fame, then you need to check out the audio archives here on the 790 website and listen to it. Bob Ryan makes for good radio. He brings unwavering, old school opinions to the show… and inevitably those opinions differ with Dan’s and that means a battle will ensue. Bob Ryan is a great guest… and I think he has stolen the number two slot with his most recent appearance. In fact, Bob Ryan’s last 3 or 4 appearances have been really solid. I know… you’re thinking he’s old… he’s musty… how can he be a great guest? How can he be second to Michael Irvin’s number one? Just listen to the Bob Ryan segments on the web site archives and you’ll understand.
Frank Caliendo is always a good, regular guest too… but he’s performing. He’s not the typical guest that we’re trying to get information or stories out of. He’s there to entertain, and he always does it well. But because he’s a professional performer, and he’s on the station to perform, I disqualify him from my list.
Other guests that we’re ALWAYS certain to get a good segment out of: Charles Barkley, Max Kellerman, Terrell Owens and Uncle Luke. Uncle Luke is great because he’ll mix it up with LeBatard and that always entertains me. T.O. is fun because he’s not like you’d expect him to be. All season long he was playful and entertaining. Max Kellerman entertains me because of “the way” he talks. Always in your face, always clever and entertaining. Barkey is in a class by himself, because he has interesting opinions… and great stories about gambling and Michael and Tiger and the rest.
And then there are the guests that you hope you can get just one or two good lines from. Guests like The Iron Sheik, who mumbled one line so incoherently that it became a memorable moment on the show. We once got Charlie Steiner to say that “Jeter Sucks.” A great one line from an otherwise unmemorable appearance. Who else has uttered one or two lines that made the interview worthwhile? Oh, I got one. Tim Hardaway.
March 5th, 2007
